POEMS - F TO L
Fantasia *
O poeta me falou De bem, esperança e paz Mas depois ele acordou Fantasia, nada mais O tal poeta me contou Que com amor tudo se faz Mas foi só dor que lhe restou Fantasia, nada mais Esse poeta afirmou Que se deve ser audaz Foi então que fraquejou Fantasia, nada mais O mesmo poeta chorou Porque tudo se desfaz De eterno, nada sobrou Fantasia, nada mais O pobre poeta indagou Onde sua musa jaz A inspiração lhe faltou Fantasia. Nada mais. ©2002 Gisele Marasca 06/08/02 * TRANSLATION: Fantasy The poet spoke to me Of goodness, hope and peace But then he awoke Fantasy, nothing more Such poet told me That love conquers all But pain was all he had left Fantasy, nothing more This poet still affirmed That we have to dare But then he felt weak Fantasy, nothing more The same poet wept For everything fades away Of eternal, none was left Fantasy, nothing more The poor poet asked Where his muse lay to rest The inspiration was gone Fantasy. Nothing more. ============================================================= Favorite Like a sultan, sheik, maharajah You pick, you choose or let go You decide when or where How much, how little How soon, if ever Not your only, your main Never your first or last Just another in many Merely, routinely a favorite ©2004 Gisele Marasca 12/10/04 ============================================================= Fear Fear of being seen, fear of getting involved, fear Of the consequences, fear of the causes, fear of feeling too much, Fear of not feeling at all, fear of letting it out, fear of keeping it in, Fear of getting to know, fear of being in the dark, fear Of the pain, fear of the joy, fear of life, fear of death, fear of myself, Fear of you, fear of us together, Then apart, Transcendental, Overwhelming, incapacitating, powerful, raw, fear. ©2000 Gisele Marasca ============================================================= Follow Don’t worry about tomorrow Just follow your heart, Your hopes and dreams Follow your instinct Your path ahead Follow the lead, The light Follow the truth The insight Follow your muse In the night Just follow And you will live ©2005 Gisele Marasca 01/19/05 ============================================================= For Sam It’s done And you, so full of sorrow now A dark veil covers the bright path ahead Which you cannot see Such difficult decision, Even harder conclusion A necessary obstacle, invaluable life lesson Making who you are, shaping who you will be Be brave, keep looking to that path ahead, Never forgetting you are not alone God loves you And always will ©2003 Gisele Marasca 07/27/03 ============================================================= Going Nowhere Stale Stagnant Boring Too placid Complacent Almost stopping Going nowhere Slow.... slow.... slow So low Almost none Gone ©2001 Gisele Marasca 07/31/01 ============================================================= I Am I am Me Expanded Larger than life Universal ©2008 Gisele Marasca 02/04/08 ============================================================= I Can Love You I find that I can love you Wondrous, liberating discovery That it doesn’t matter how Tentatively or intensely Maybe afraid, maybe bravely Feeling loved in return Or completely alone Feeling quite mature, Or perhaps a bit insane I can allow myself to love you I feel that I can love you In peace or quiet unrest In the distance, through the night During the daily mundane tasks In depth or just on the surface Thoroughly or in smaller doses Occasionally or all the time Passionately, but also tenderly Or even somewhat detached I can definitely love you I know that I can love you Even if you are not perfect Even if I’m not consistent Even when I don’t have you Even if we are just meant To cross each other’s path And in passing, painfully Learn our love lessons Then float on and away I can still choose to love you ©2006 Gisele Marasca 08/12/06 ============================================================= I Can’t I can still feel you in me, still so much part of me I can barely stand the hurt I know I’m causing you I can be there for you and try to help you through But I can’t just close my eyes and pretend anymore I can see what went wrong, what will never change I can believe in the potential of what could be different I can also understand that it would never be the same I just can’t search for the meaning of us anymore I can remember every moment, every time, every thing I can promise that my memory of you will always be I can cry for you, hold you, and say I’ll miss you But I can’t wait, long and hope for you anymore I can mourn the ending of what could have been I can regret that we were not able to find a way I can hope that we still might find it some day But I can’t tell you I will stay forever anymore I can wish that you find happiness somewhere I can put behind the disappointment and the pain I can even say that I didn’t love you in vain I just can’t love you as you need me to anymore ©2001 Gisele Marasca 01/17/01 ============================================================= I Dream I dream of an imaginary you By my side An idealized you Who made the hard choices Who heeded the signs Who had the courage Who took a stand I dream of my own creation of you One who was never born One who never can be I dream of my illusion of you A vague silhouette, A mere mirage, a pale shadow I dream of a vision of you Who only exists in my blurry, foggy eyes And survives from scraps of distorted memories And so I float alone and away On and on through my unconnected life As I dream of the one who never was As I keep dreaming of the unreal you ©2006 Gisele Marasca 05/22/06 ============================================================= I Know Your Heart (For R.) You may be flawed in your approach Lack or exceed in communication You may be hard to take at times Rough around the edges Prickly, bristled, barbed Irritable, pettish, cross Often under illusions, wounded Out of control or over the top You may be forgetful or careless at times Emotionally absent, even Falling short (fairly or not) So distracted about us Painfully out of touch Harshly out of tune Doing your worst, trying your best Only to miss... and miss again But deep down When it matters I know your heart Your beautiful, caring Generous, giving Peaceful, gentle First class, top of the line One of a kind Universal, transcendental Lovingly strong, softly beating Heart ©2023 Gisele Marasca 05/16/23 ============================================================= I See You You pride yourself on not feeling, On not wanting, never needing, On being neutral And so completely in control But in spite of your cold style, Your strict rules, limited views And narrow sight, I can still see the Universe in your eyes ©2002 Gisele Marasca 08/17/02 ============================================================= I Set You Free I do love you With the force of a love that can’t be denied Believe me, I tried So many times In so many ways In day and night dreams In prose and in verse In pain and in vain But you are not my answer In this lifetime You are just a lesson I had to learn the hard way The slow way, the only way Now, lesson learned, I set you free And I would kindly appreciate it If you returned the favor ©2007 Gisele Marasca 07/11/07 ============================================================= I Trust In spite of myself, I trust For better or for worse, I trust Knowing without knowledge, I trust In faith or senselessly, I trust With confidence or weakly, I trust On firm or soft ground, I trust With ease or resistance, I trust With discipline or uncontrolled, I trust In light or darkness, I trust Helplessly, Hopefully, I trust Dutifully, Wondrously, I trust When I am alone, And feeling afraid, I trust When all is lost When there’s nothing left Or nothing I can do I trust ©2021 Gisele Marasca-Vargas; 04/08/21 Vertical Divider
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I Want You I want you to miss me As you miss the womb you were torn from I want you to hunger for my whisper, my scent, the softness of my skin, And then realize how blind you were I want you to burn, I want you to toss and turn in your longing, your aching for me I want you to be consumed in your latent passion for me I want your memories of me to flow, frequent and flawless, through your mind And your fantasies of me to drive you wild, more than any reality ever could I want you to writhe in misery for knowing we could have been I want you to regret not having taken the risk As a gambler who folds to soon I want you to despair in the knowledge that I am your impossible dream, your missed opportunity, your last chance, your only hope, your whole world I want you to drown in the same agony you were trying to spare yourself by turning away from me and I want you to realize what a trivial price that would have been I want you to be together, but so alone I want you to cry as a motherless child I want you to curse all your fears I want you to endure a lifeless existence And lose your mind and imagination I want you to die a little more Every day I’m not by your side And when you finally understand how much you need me, I want to want you no more. ©2000 Gisele Marasca ============================================================= If I Only Knew If I only knew the difference between What I want and what I need If I only knew how to be happy With who I am and what I have If I only knew how not to repeat old patterns And how to step out of a vicious cycle If I only knew how to believe When life doesn’t make it easy If I only knew how to pick myself up And dust myself off when I fall If I only knew how to be More tolerant and understanding More accepting and less self-centered And still be true to my whole self If I only knew How to bring the past to term How to make my dreams a reality How to deal with disillusion How to make the best of it How to accept, but not compromise How to shine, but not overshadow How to help, but not interfere How to live, not just exist If I only knew how to be A better listener Less of a talker A lot wiser Less impulsive More persistent Less impatient More serene Less aggressive More centered Less insecure More spiritual Less material If I only knew All of those things, well Then I would just be Too damn good for this world ©2000 Gisele Marasca ============================================================= In The End Sometimes I feel I don’t have the answers I don’t have the courage, the wisdom I don’t have the vision or direction I don’t have the will or the way Sometimes I falter I hesitate, I stumble Very often I fear, I wonder if I’m on the right track Too many times I vacillate, make the wrong choices or do nothing when I should act And yet There’s this transcendental feeling That the Universe is unfolding as it should And that I’ll get where I need to be Through the endless detours In the end ©2005 Gisele Marasca 01/23/05 ============================================================= In the Outskirts As the world turns Inside out Upside down, More and more are Barely living or Merely surviving In the outskirts ©2024 Gisele Marasca 02/29/24 ============================================================= Is That All? To be insignificant, fragile, frail Infinitesimally small In the Big Scheme Of Things? To be half eaten while still living By one higher in the food chain To make me bear witness to your pain When it was just too late to intervene To compel me to call for assistance To help end your short existence Is that all you came here for? ©2024 Gisele Marasca 03/01/24 ============================================================= It Came Just ignore it, I thought to myself And it will have to go away It can’t survive if I don’t feed it It needs a place to stay But it kept coming back to me And it just wouldn’t let me go And it made it feel so right And it made me want to know Run away, I said to myself It is not a good time for this I have to avoid the heartache That has to come after the bliss So I tried to treat it badly And I tried to push it away But it just looked at me sadly And said it was here to stay I cried, please shut it off I begged, shut it away Shut it up, shut it down Shut it, just shut it, I pray! I thought, I said, and I tried But it just wouldn’t go away Too late; it’s too late, I said Now it is here to stay ©2000 Gisele Marasca 12/00 ============================================================= It's Time We seem to be going through a spiritual crisis that can be seen and felt in our state of affairs, in the current health crisis, throughout the whole world… We believe disbelieving We trust without trust We don’t really let go; we have a hard time forgiving ourselves and others We lack in care and compassion for people and other living beings, for the planet that sustains us We think so much of ourselves and so little of others; and when we think of others, it’s often to opinionate, interfere or enable We talk a lot, but don’t listen a great deal We don’t want to be judged, but constantly hit the gavel on the base We want openness and acceptance, but are often close-minded and unyielding We want attention and sympathy, but don’t offer that much We get lost in semantics and definitions and comparisons We believe we own the one truth (or lack thereof) We beat our chests professing this or that conviction, but our thoughts and actions hardly ever reflect what we express ever so loudly We harden our hearts and justify ourselves and our reactions, but are intolerant of the same in others We want so much, but we want it fast and easy, not wanting to work too hard or pay the price And still we expect, demand and feel entitled to all that is good Whenever we are tested in our resolve, we suffer and complain in a complacent way; we are angry and depressed; we indulge and numb; we blame others and deflect; and we fail to listen to the higher guidance that’s so lovingly and freely offered to us We take too much responsibility for what’s not ours to carry or fix, and not enough for what is But there’s hope; the answers are within all of us We are here, we are now for a reason It’s time to connect with our inner power and soul purpose It’s time for change on a deeper level To rediscover ourselves To find our truth and follow our calling Not on the surface, not just with lip service It’s time to mean and to own it, It’s time to deliver And be delivered in Love and Light It’s time © 2020 Gisele Marasca 05/28/20 ============================================================= Just Love Love Unrestricted Uncontained Without fear Without gain Love Without rules Without pauses No consequence, Reasons, causes Love First and last In pleasure or pain Right or wrong Even in vain Love With all your soul With all your might Just love and love And fill your heart ©2008 Gisele Marasca 02/05/08 ============================================================= Less Every time you show lack of passion lack of interest lack of effort lack of You make me less interested less passionate less willing lesser me ©2003 Gisele Marasca 01/01/03 ============================================================= Letter To A Potential Lover * I know you are out there. Also waiting. Longing. Dreaming. Yes, I’m talking to you. I know who you are. You will move me... You will move me to ecstasy. You will move me to tears. You will move me to tenderness. You will appreciate every part of me. You will need me more than life. You will make me suffer, but that will just make me feel more alive. Yes, you will be sensitive, but not sentimental... You will be passionate, but not fanatic. You won’t be afraid of saying what you think, feeling what you feel. You won’t be afraid to look deep into my eyes, to dive in, to bare your soul. And you will help me lose my own fears. You will be daring, experimental. You won’t accept set rules; you will make your own. But you will be fair and compassionate. You will enjoy the scent of a woman, the taste of a woman. You will love to love. You will be a giver, but you will be willing to receive all the love, all the passion I have been storing for you. You will understand everything better than the others; you will know what is going on. You will get the subtleties, the nuances of life. We will connect on a deeper level than most people. But we will have to pretend for everybody else’s sake. I will not have a choice but to love you. I’m waiting for you. I’m preparing for you. For when you finally come to me, I will have learned to not try to protect myself, to close myself in my own little shell, to delude myself into thinking that life is supposed to be easy and that the pleasure is not worth all the pain. I will be ready for you. Because you will make me believe in love, in life. Even if for just a fleeting moment in time. ©1999 Gisele Marasca * Published as part of the anthology Poets Unleashed, compiled by Ron Cross ============================================================= Life... As Seen Upside Down Which side up? Am I upside down or Has the world flipped on me? Birds are flying belly up The tree tops turned bottom heavy And everyone else’s bottom up I can walk on the sky And the earth is the limit And life is so much more fun When seen upside down ©2023 Gisele Marasca-Vargas; 05/01/23 ============================================================= Love Again Not you Nothing you could do Now and before Ever again No pain or shame For you or him Will change what is What has always been It was time Term Too soon Not soon enough No matter now It will come to pass And you will trust Love again ©2004 Gisele Marasca 03/20/04 ============================================================= Love In Fur At night all cats are gray In the dark, in the shadows Of our beings Other mystical realms But light reveals glaring colors, Beguiling nuances Sinuous shapes, sharp senses Independent love Yet needy, demanding at times Disdainful love Yet profound, intense at times Always watchful, ever present Loyal, playful, mischievous Love in fur ©2023 Gisele Marasca-Vargas; 04/29/23 |